Hodgkinsons I'm Fifteen And My Dad's Dying Of (cancer) Non-hodgkinsons Lymphoma?

I'm fifteen and my dad's dying of (cancer) non-hodgkinsons lymphoma? - hodgkinsons

But I'm in mourning.
I do not suffer.
Why do not touch me?
The only answer I have is that everything you contributed to my life is money. We have always had a terrible relationship.
My mother had breast cancer this time last year and had a mistectomy it is now well. Besides, I know if my mother was dying, I just want, I'll kill myself. Horribles is thinking. Am I just fk'd above.